A little lost maybe?

It's almost 3 months into work. I had ample time to get used to this lifestyle. But... I'm not. Ha! There's something missing for some reason. I'm missing something. Passion. But I love science. I love doing those weird experiments. I love playing with the subjects. I also (actually) thank them for being such a dear and let us do it. But... there's still something missing. I'm lost. I don't know what I want anymore. Sigh.

But the Australian Defense Forsce scholarship for undergrad study sure is interesting. I get to study another degree while part time working with them. Means, I'm earning and traveeling while studying. Heck, why am I not a skippy?

My first Laptop

The screen laptop that i used to use died on me one day. SO my plans for getting a car was suddenly changed into "I need a laptop'. Hence, 2 weeks ago, I got myself a laptop. This is the first time I actually got commited to buy something expensive. After much research, I decided I do not need anything fancy. I just need someting that works fast because I'm not an impatient person. ALso, it would not cost a lot so my savings for the car-to-be is still going on.

Lenovo, which was previously known as IBM, has a range of budget laptops. Initially i was apprehensive on the name which was linked to China, but I trust IBM and it was within budget. Slip slop slap and next thing I know, I was driving up the city to pick it up. It.s pretty good for a $826 laptop. It's got 3 G RAM, 2.16GHz processor, webcam, 250G HDD. I couldn't find anything of anybrand that's giving that price. I'm content. Not happy cos stupid Daniel had to show me an Acer laptop went on sale a week after my purchase for $899 with 4 G RAM, Intel Core 2 dual processor, about the same HDD but with much better graphics. Bleh. Screw it. I'm happy with my purchase.

over eating again

Bahhh been overeating for the past many weeks. too much good food!!

Spontaneous things

A colleague of mine is getting married the next weekend. She was having a bridal glow and didn't seem to stress very much. Her aura of excitement quickly caught on to me. However, the conversation I had with Daniel was not exactly leading to the same result.

Me: Oo, my workmate is getting married! So nice... she's so happy and all.
Dan: Mm.
Me: I wanna marry~~~ ^_^
Dan:Um. Don't think that can happen just yet....
Me: Who says I wanna marry you?

Things I do to torment his poor soul....

On another spontaneous issue, I joined the gym! Now I just have to workout. No matter what. I will have to. I'm looking forward to see results~~~~

I forgot how I should look

I had been feeling rather mundane with life from just work and home. I have been feeling rather unsettling lately for some reason. The 'lost' feeling was lingering. I was not doing things that I really like in life I suspect. I was unsure how to improve my quality of life.

It was a light day, so I got off work early. Being a Thursday, the mall where I have the bus interchange had a late night shopping. I thought, why not. Just a some walk and window shopping might lift my feeling. I was looking at clothes and walking past boutiques and myers. I ran my fingers through the cloth materials that are not unfamiliar to my usual t-shirt and jeans. I think I hit home. I want to change. I want to stop not caring how I look anymore. I want to look good. I want to have a life. I want to treat myself. I want to remember who I was before I forgot myself in the last few years. Maybe I had an overdrive of feminine hormone. I don't care.

I will now start to change my wardrobe a little at a time to start with. Then eat healthy and start exercising. I want to put more care into how I look to go to work. No more glasses and in with the contacts. It has been too long since I want to look nice just because. Not only for that special occasion that I go out for a musical or a friend's birthday party. I have been feeling much too comfortable to look... mundane. I don't think I will put on make-up everyday. I just want to look good and feel good. I'm sick of my old lifestyle. I demand to change.

Wish me luck.

An ouchie in my eye

One week into work and I come out with a pain in my eye (just the lid on my left eye). It was rather irritating and gives me a slight pain everytime I blink. When I got it on Friday, I thought it was from a wrong positioning of my sleeping pattern. But it didn't go away today either. It got me into thinking (in horror) that I already developed an allergic reaction in working at the laboratory. The mind then went into oh-no-i've-gotta-quit-me-job-and-have-no-income-again state. Quickly after that I was thinking what if it's something infectious and will cause me an eye. Maybe I flicked one of the drugs into my eye without knowing. And I became a worry wort. My aunt reckoned it was a "ngan tiu cham", a condition where part of the eyelid got infected result from being a peeping tom. It didn't look like the usual "ngan tiu cham" i encountered on other people, so off I go to the docs. My visit to the clinic resulted with the confirmation that I have a stye, which indeed is a "ngan tiu cham". So yes, I have to live with the teases of me peeping at people's keyhole, in particular, Daniel's. Bah.

The stye is an infection (may due to a blockage) of one of the glands under our eyelashes. It can be treated with antibiotic ointment for the eye. However, the most effective way of treating it would be to put something warm on it to let it drain, such as warm towel, rice, hard boiled egg and baked potato wrapped in damp clothes. Very important to keep it clean all the time. When comes the asian way... I remember I used to see people with swollen eyelids had black strings on their middle finger (it's suppose to help). Dan Tang told me I should use the opposite hand to go around my head and gently tug on my eye (this makes more sense than black string). Education program over now. Time to make potato and put it on my face.